Here I am, gazing into the world
Oh, what obstacles I see.
Everything's practically bigger than me.
Oh no, I seem so small,
How can I do anything at all?
But wait.
Wait and see.
See what's missing in this world in front of me.
Maybe a little kindness
Maybe a little heart
Maybe a little strength, determination;
Maybe a little something like me.
Perhaps I belong here; Perhaps I can help
I think I can.
So I push a little harder,
Oh, I'm almost to the top,
but then came the pop.
Oh, a screw came loose, and I'm way off track,
And everyone starts to question, How will you ever get back?
But wait.
Wait and see.
See what's needed in this journey to the top.
Just a little courage,
And a little heart,
And a little perseverance,
And belief that I'll make it to the top.
"It's just a little screw." I said; I'll make it to the top.
I know I can.
(The Little Engine that Could)
HEYYY LEAH :D
ReplyDeleteYour poem was so cute! I love it. Honestly.. I have nothing, nothing to critique on yours. It was good overall. Uh.. I guess you could change this line " Oh, a screw came loose.. " into " Oh no, a screw came loose " so you could match the top part. Yeah. GREAT POEM. :D
Hey Leah (:
ReplyDeleteI really like your poem. I like how you used repetition to prove your point which was very good. Also I like how you explained your allusion in which it was the little engine. But i agree with lex on the part you could fix but other than that it is super good. Keep it up!
Hi Leah,
ReplyDeleteYour allusion poem is very nicely structured. You include repeated lines and phrases and patterns that make the poem flow and keep it on track (pun intended ;)
What I'd like to see is more about you and your life and how it connects to the allusion...Since you already have such a nice set of paralleled stanzas, maybe you make one about the allusion and the other about your life.
mrs s