Friday, November 26, 2010

KC3 Cause and Effect Essay DRAFT

Long ago, Hawaii’s people lived in harmony with their land. People were resourceful and aware of the sacred value of the land and took care of it. However, due to the westernization of the Hawaiian Islands, land was sold and developed in various ways, creating tension amongst Hawaii’s native people and the overuse of our island paradise.

What was once a paradise featuring some of nature’s best has changed into another “big city” containing industrial factories, tall business buildings, and hotels. In ancient Hawaii, the Native Hawaiians realized how much the land gave them, and in return, they believed they were to serve the land. They had a system of ahupua`as where they only took what was needed. However, when they were annexed to the U.S. and trade became more accessible, they lost their ancient ways and adapted to the western style of taking from the land, and profiting from that. Eventually, so much was taken, that paradise was taken as well.

Since the year 2000, Native Hawaiians have struggled to keep land from being westernized and developed. Unlike Native Hawaiians, Non-Native Hawaiians tend to feel that land is a commodity. Generally, Native Hawaiians feel as if the land is alive and is a part of them. Therefore, _[insert quote]__. When the Native Hawaiians lost their land to the U.S. government during annexation, the land was sold in large amounts to foreigners at cheap costs. Currently, the government only owns roughly half of Hawaii’s land (consisting mostly of military bases and nature reserves). Seven-eights of the privately owned land in Hawaii is in the hands of only 39 owners, each owning 2,000 hectares or more. On all islands except Oahu, major landowners control about 90% of all private property. These lands were gained during the 19th century when the monarchy was declining and during The Great Mahele, a change in the land tenure system. Major owners tend to hold onto their lands, making it difficult for others to break up ownership patterns. Due to westernization, these lands have been developed and deprived of the natural state that the Native Hawaiians cherish. Since a lot of land is not in the hands of the government, Native Hawaiians have faced countless struggles in attaining those lands back.

In addition, the developments of these lands have enraged the Hawaiians. Lawsuits and legal problems have even reached the Supreme Court. For example, Hawaiians are now granted the right that they must be contacted before the state makes major developments.

As islands, Hawaii must be careful of preserving their resources. Rapid development has destroyed many of our natural forests, lands, and watersheds in the process. Therefore there’s not much land left for Hawaii’s 21,000 plus species, 9,000 of which are endemic to Hawaii. Hawaii is known for its nature, plants, and animals. However, as western ways become more prevalent through development projects, ranging from freeways to rail systems, and to industrial companies and buildings, Hawaii’s natural resources are suffering. In addition, these developments have brought more people to Hawaii, increasing the population. Hawaii has overextended itself.

The many issues brought upon by land development and westernization are greatly debatable and affecting Hawaii’s people, animals, plants, and3 especially Hawaii’s lands.

3 comments:

  1. This is a really good draft. I like how the beginning and end not only show how Hawaii changed but linked mainly to your subtopic and doesn't fall into other people's subtopics. By reading this draft I could tell there was a lot of research done and a lot of evidence on why land use is a problem in Hawaii. There was also a lot of show on the effect it has on Hawaii today. I dont think much improvements need to be made other than putting a little more causes that happened in the past. Other than that, this draft was well put together.
    -Christian

    ReplyDelete
  2. I liked how you used your cause and effect really well. You did a good job of showing statistics and your thesis statement is well shown. aAt this point I have no advice I can give you to imoprove it You should get an A+
    - Chad Masuda

    ReplyDelete
  3. Hi Leah,
    I'm not sure what was added since the impromptu. Were you able to find specific developments or landowners?
    Commentary: Cristian--fairly specific; could be more do. Chad--too general. You need to be much more specific to get credit for your ccommentary.
    mrs s

    ReplyDelete